Life (Who knows?)

I suppose it is just an attribute of getting older but I seem to appreciate life a little more each year. And not just my own life, but life in general. That is not to say that I never lived a time when I did not cherish life (my mother always said I was a "live and let live" type of person). In fact, I've always believed murder, the taking of another life, to be the most heinous, most deplorable, most scornful crime to commit. And to clarify, I'm talking about "circle of life" shit, not just my life and my experience and selfish shit like that. But life. All life. Lifeforms, big and small.

Maybe it's the youthful enthusiasm I see in Lexi, the little kitten, everyday that reminds me of life anew. Maybe it is the passing of my great uncle Bill that reminds me that life ends too quickly. Who knows?

I immensely enjoyed watching the mama robin sit on her eggs outside the kitchen window. I watched those chicks hatch. I watched them grow. I watched them leave the nest. It all happened so fast. Where are they now? Are they still in the neighborhood? Who knows?

Maybe the fact that Big Daddy, my prize goldfish in my pond, has gone missing that reminds me that life is nothing to take for granted. Really, you may ask? A goldfish can teach a lesson in life? Sure, I say. I fed him. I kept him alive. Sure, he could scrounge around the pond and maybe eek out an existence. But I was his provider. And he's gone. What got him? Blue heron? Raccoon? Ninjas? Who knows?

I am growing grape tomatoes, hybrid tomatoes, serrano peppers, banana peppers, green peppers, and casabella peppers. I don't have a garden but instead I am growing them in planters. The flowers on the tomatoes are turning into little green mini-tomatoes. I am really excited about the process. And besides enjoying the vegetables that I'm growing, I am most excited about the prospect of growing new plants next year from the seeds I collect from the veggies this year. Why? What's the big deal when I can just go buy another pack of seeds? Or just go buy the veggies at the store? Who knows?

And then there is the cardinal chick that's been hanging around the yard. I thought it was a goner. But then I noticed mama cardinal bringing food to him/her. She's been doing that for the last two days. The chick has made its way from the pond's perimeter to the front yard shrubs. Maybe tomorrow he'll catch the wind just the right way and fly away. Who knows?

So today will end and tomorrow will begin. The earth will turn and the big ball in the sky will keep reminding us that we have one more day (at least for the next 5 billion years or so). Why am I so lucky to be conscious and self-aware? What right do I have to enjoy all of these little things in life? Who put me here? What's the plan? How long do I have?

Who knows?

But really, honestly, who cares? Live and let live. Enjoy what you can. Love every moment while you have it. Love it and live it... and maybe die with a smile when the end finally does come.